Tuesday, January 26, 2010

My Life Be Like...

strange. That's all I can say.

Because Jonathan is in school all day, and I am not, and work consists of 3-6 hours a week, I find myself with a LOT of free time.
Ways that I put this time to good use: decorate the nursery, watch old movies on AMC and TCM, bake..bake..bake away, clean, paint things, talk to mom and friends on the phone...among other seemingly nonchalant activities. But honestly, I love it. I have more time to free my thinking and relax. I read stuff that normally I wouldn't have time for. I create new crockpot recipes and keep things in order. I plug my ears into my favorite music and let it take over. I daydream endlessly about bringing a child into our family and the kind of mother that I hope to be. I sleep, because my body demands it, and it is so refreshing. This is the first time in my whole life that I have not been either in school or working, and I think it is needed. To put myself back together.

It is a precious time, and everyone keeps telling me to enjoy it "while it lasts". Can I just say how tired I am of hearing that phrase? "Get all your sleep now, while it lasts...." "Be sure to give your hubby lots of attention, while it lasts..." "Get all that you need to get done now, while it lasts..." "BE A SUPER HUMAN NOW, WHILE IT LASTS..." You know, I'm pretty sure that I realize what life will be like with a baby. I have seen it and witnessed it and heard about it for the last year...and I could not be more anxious for April to come. It's going to be tough and crazy and exhausting to say the least, but I don't need to be put back in my place just because I am enjoying *this* time. that is all.

Well....I'm not exactly sure where this is all coming from. I guess I just have a lot going on this head of mine- so many feelings- that my heart is a little more delicate than usual. So bear with me people. But what matters is that, overall, I am happy. This hasn't always been easy for me, so..."while it lasts" just let me enjoy it.

Life is to be cherished at every stage. I don't think that Heavenly Father would send us off to earth with "Now when times are tough, nothing will cheer you up. But you can be happy during the times when its easy and free." It is *most important that we keep our heads up during those hard times. We can exercise our capacity to love even further when it is difficult.

3 comments:

Emily said...

I'm so glad you found me!! :) I'm excited to keep up on your blog!!

All that free time sounds soooooooo nice!! I envy you for that! :)

Judi Judkins said...

AMEN.

Diana said...

SO....I found your blog through Brock's (I'm in their ward) but I'm also married to the Heisses nephew (on the other side) ANYWAY---now that I have introduced myself, I have to tell you that I wholeheartedly agree with your "While it lasts" phase!

I hated hearing "Enjoy your sleep now, while it lasts..."over and over and over when I was pregnant....and i am determined not to say that to a pregnant woman.