Today you turn 3. Every time you have a birthday I reflect on how much you've changed and grown. There are so many things about you at this age that I don't want to forget. Like, for instance, the facial expressions you make. Like the way you give tiny closed-lipped kisses. Your hilarious personality and stubborn wit. Your way of reasoning with me and how you try so hard to get me to see your point.
You love bugs, dinosaurs, animals, cars & trucks & trains, getting dirty and throwing things like balls and oh yeah, pretty much anything. But you also like to wipe clean after a meal and keep good hygiene (i.e. toothbrushing and bathing). This is a good thing because I would go crazy if you were dirty all the time. You enjoy hair cut days because it means you get to sit naked on a towel and eat a sucker while I buzz your head. You like to pee in the potty with undies & pants completely off every time (not sure I understand that one yet).
You genuinely try and do the right thing. You have a gentle heart and a sensitive soul. When you mess up (and we all do, especially me) you feel truly bad about it. As simple as this is I think it's amazing how loudly your conscience speaks to your 3 year old self.
You really, really love your sister- even if you don't always show it. When she's not around you miss her and look everywhere for her. When she laughs you laugh. When she cries you use a sweet little voice and talk to her. Sometimes when she gets into stuff you take her arm, walk her over to me, and tell me about it. You are a wonderful big brother.
Your favorite bedtime books are "Lullaby, little One", "Lama, lama Red Pajama" and "Goodnight, Gorilla". I say to you every night as I tuck you in: "Goodnight, Gorilla" and you giggle. You still cling to your giraffe Spot and your monkey Oo-oo virtually all hours of the day.
AND yes, you still have a binkie. It's cute sometimes and it keeps you as my baby, but soon it will be time to take it away. Please don't hate me forever.
I love that you need all these comforts still. It reminds me that you are still little.
You also still have your birth bumps (that's what we call the little mole bumps on your neck). Someday we'll get them surgically removed but I don't mind waiting a good long time for that. You almost always have bruises somewhere on your body because you love to run and jump off stuff. Your bum is still the cutest in the land. Your ears still have tubes in them as far as we know (even though they were supposed to fall out last October) and they have been great at keeping ear infections at bay, even if it means you can't put your head in the water still. Hopefully they come out this summer and you can experience the feeling of being completely immersed in the pool!
I don't like being away from you. From the night you were born we haven't spent a single night completely apart. Some might think I'm paranoid or weird for that, but I just prefer that you are close. I can't imagine not seeing you to bed or in the morning when you wake up, all bouncy and happy. I need you every bit as much as you need me. You & I have a special bond that I hope never ever goes away. Sometimes we have rough days and don't like each other much, but know that I am always working on how to talk to you better, how to understand your 3 year old needs and wants, how to be a bigger person than I am so that I can be the mom you deserve.
I love you with my whole breath and soul and being. Happy birthday!